


And if you have a minute, why don't we go

by inplayruns



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Season 7 Spoilers, ep 7.21: Reading is Fundamental
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-04
Updated: 2012-05-04
Packaged: 2017-11-04 20:15:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/397783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inplayruns/pseuds/inplayruns
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean knew Cas. Used to know. Knows.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And if you have a minute, why don't we go

**Author's Note:**

> From [this ](http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=m4l2BTlqRLA) sneak peek, because I enjoy depressing myself. Title from Keane.

Dean used to know Cas with his hands. He knew the coat, sure, before the blood had caked into the material and stiffened it, knew it rubbing against his arm while he shook with laughter outside a brothel. He knew how awkward it was to push it off, and the heavy thunk of it onto bedsheets (or just the floor, the seats of the Impala, the ground, it’s not like they ever had a lot of time).

But he knew Cas, all of him, how long his neck was when he didn’t have the collar and tie hiding the skin there. He knew how he was firm under all those dumpy layers, and how it was to skim a hand over his stomach when it had gone tacky with both their arousals. He knew how to get Cas’ nipples to stiffen up, knew how they felt against his tongue, and he knew that Cas didn’t even like that stuff all that much anyway; he tended to squirm until Dean moved down. Cas was all about the main event, and Dean knew that.

He doesn’t know Cas now. Maybe he did for a couple of stolen hours while the sun rose over this shitty little hospital, but Cas got snatched away. And now he’s got -

It’s not like Cas isn’t in there, somewhere, puzzling over the tablet and talking about the Metatron and the other angels. Maybe it was a thing in Dean’s life that he was doomed to only love, in whatever way, giant nerds. This is just - the sliced-down version of Cas, a Cas from another universe who’s A-OK with Lucifer in his head - not even paying rent - and makes fart jokes and has merry, _terrifying_ eyes.

“I love you guys,” Cas exhales, and Dean feels his angelic strength clamp down on his back, and Sam’s too. Part of this is hilarious, but most of him feels nauseous.

He used to know Cas about as well as he could know a screaming death ray, but they never hugged. Dean’s still angry at him, angry at himself for not being able to save him from the brink, stop him from working with Crowley, angry at the world for piling this shit on Cas who never asked for any of this when he saved Dean’s ass from the Pit. It’s fucking unfair that this is happening now. He knows it’s lame-ass, but all he can do is pat his side.

He leaves it there, though. Just for a beat too long. That’s for the Cas who knows him too, and knows what the splay of his hand looks like against the swell of his ribcage. The Cas who’s still in there, somewhere.


End file.
